Before the Endless Night Falls
by Genius-626
Summary: Pre-movie. Backstory for Priest, Priestess and Black Hat as they meet and train to become vampire killing machines. Later chapters will venture into Owen's backstory as well as others, so stay tuned. Strong PriestXPriestess cause I'm a hopless romantic
1. Bonding

**A/N: Hey everybody. Well, I have some writers block for my other Priest fic, Rightful Rebellion, so I'm trying to exercise my mind with something different. I've also been busy writing my Matrix fics, so that's another reason I haven't been updating. **

**These short-ish chapters will be pre-movie exploring the relationship between Priest and Priestess after they first meet (just because I'm curious.) Its currently in Priest's POV, and I think that's how I'm keeping it. **

Before the Endless Night Falls

She was only 12. How was she so young _and_ so gifted? How did they find her?

I was one of the oldest chosen, which was a risk for them, I was told. My loyalties weren't questioned, however, because of how they found me. I was eighteen and more than faithful to the church, so they must have known my name through the clergymen that knew me well enough. They told me that I was chosen by God because I was meant for something more than the life I lived. My trust in God helped me decide to leave everything I loved; everything I still loved. But that life…I don't know whether it would inspire me or hold me back. Either way, I was living a new life now, and I had to get used to it. Some trainees were already dropping out; they couldn't handle the pressure. But I knew I was stronger than that, and so was this young girl. I would become a Priest, and she, a Priestess.

The first time I saw her was when she registering for a room. One of the clergyman in charge of us had a tight grip on her small shoulder and was guiding her through the halls. I was standing outside of the room I shared with another boy. No one had names here, they had told us that names held us back; tied us to our old lives when we had to focus on training. We had numbers. My number was 11. My roommate's, 14.

Hers was 7.

The Clergyman led her down the hall and he made eye contact with me. We both nodded in acknowledgment; I earned that through my training. As they passed, I kept my eyes on the girl. Unexpectedly, her eyes darted towards mine. I could see her soul through those eyes. I'd been days since then, and I still couldn't get that look she gave me out of my head.

I saw her sitting alone in the dirt. Her legs were crossed, her arms lightly hugging herself. She was outside the girl's hall of rooms, probably getting some air. Maybe some peace. At the time, I didn't care if she wanted to be alone. She looked lonely enough. She was the youngest of the chosen ones and I couldn't imagine being her age and having to accept all this.

She looked up at me, I think, when she saw my shadow. It was dark, but then again, it was always dark. The distant streetlight lit half of her face and I could see faint tear streaks staining her cheeks. So maybe she wasn't as strong as I thought, but I couldn't judge. Time will tell.

The second time I saw her was in the training ring. She was being shown how to throw a knife properly. She wasn't perfect, but determined to get better. I was entranced watching her, although I never would have admitted it. She was stronger than she looked, and pain didn't seem to be a problem for her. I could tell that her muscles were aching by how she gradually began to slow down throughout the two hours of her introductory training, but she showed no signs of discomfort. It was like she'd already lived here as long as I have, which was about three months. We didn't meet eyes this time. She didn't even know I was there, I was hiding under the stands surrounding the miniature arena. At first, I had forgotten that I was invisible to her.

I sat next to her after she looked up, fearlessly looking into my eyes. She tensed some. We were silent while I was trying to think of what to say. What to say to this girl I hardly knew? Then it hit me.

"We'll be partners, you and I, when we enter the war." I tried to say this softly, so only she could hear me. It was a subtle sign telling her that I specifically wanted to talk to her; that this wasn't just a speech I gave to all the new girls. She understood with a slight shift in her energy. She was no longer tense. I had more to say, but was curious as to how she would respond.

She didn't say anything, but by the nod of her head, I could tell that she was either grateful for my company or grateful for what I had said.

I continued. "We'll have to look out for each other. We'll have to trust each other." I looked at her, willing her eyes to look into mine. They did. "Can you trust me?"

She nodded, then I heard her voice for the first time, although just by looking at her, I could've sworn I'd already heard it in my heart. "I trust you."

We formed a bond that day, something we both needed; something we'd both been without for a long while. She was so young; I felt I had to protect her. I had to do something for her. I felt like I already knew her. I'd heard people speak of this kind of connection; of past lives meeting again. I didn't know if I believed it, but it gave me comfort to know I'd be with her. It made me feel human to care, and I liked that feeling.

**So yeah, pretty short chapter, but there's more to come. Sorry if it sounds unoriginal, I sware it'll get more interesting, this is just an introduction. Tell me if the format was confusing, because I can't really tell. **

**Anyway, Priest fans unite! :D (Because seriously, no one I know at home likes Priest as much as I do)**


	2. Forgiving

**A/N: Woot, second chapter :D**

**Ok, guys, I think every chapter might be one year into the future from the last, got it? So that would make Priest 19 and Priestess 13 in this one. Yes? Ok, cool. I mean, I might change it later, but I don't know yet. So enjoy this, and remember, one year later ;)**

Before the Endless Night Falls

She was hurt. By _my_ hand. Why they assigned us to brawl against each other, I don't know, but I had my suspicions.

_I ran to her once she didn't get up. She tried, and then braced herself in searing pain. There weren't many people watching, but I could hear those who were. They were in disapproval of my reaction. I didn't care about them, I only cared about her. I yelled for the medic and he quickly came. I held her all the while, wanting only to hold her closer. She cringed at his touch, but relaxed at mine. It made me feel good, smoothing her hair with my free hand, making her forget the pain I had just inflicted upon her. It was when the medic took her to the ER that I heard her real cry of pain. I reached out when he took her away from me—_

My eyes flew open as I jerked myself awake. I was dreaming of what happened earlier. I looked over to my roommate who I suspected wasn't asleep. After a moment, I heard him chuckling to himself. I sat up, signaling him to say what was on his mind.

"They randomly choose opponents. Relax." He told me. He was half asleep, a hat over his eyes as he leaned against the wall. That hat wasn't allowed here, we weren't allowed to have keep sakes. But it was his father's. His dead father's. I never ratted him out, it didn't seem necessary.

He didn't care about my grief, but I knew he didn't want me to worry.

I was sitting on my cot across the room from his, my head buried in my arms. It was torture just sitting there. I had to see her. I had to tell her. I didn't say a word, I just got up and put a decent shirt on over my under shirt. As I started tying my boots, I could hear my roommate's feet hit the ground. I didn't look up, but I knew he was leaning over his knees, looking at me. I got up and stepped two steps to the door. I knew he wanted to say something, so I waited before turning the door knob.

He shook his head and smiled. A wry smile; there was no happiness, only mild amusement. "I tell yah, if you get any closer to that girl, you'll be hurtin' in the war. You knocked the wind out of her and left a few scratches, big whoop. But out there…that's where the bloodshed is. They're waiting for us."

"I'll protect her." I said, trying to defend myself. He only grinned wider.

"And she'll protect you, yadda, yadda. Look, I'm not trying to sound heartless, I just don't want you to get too attached. It's for your own good, that's why I'm 14 and you're 11. That's why we don't speak to anyone on the outside of this God forsaken boot camp."

I stopped him there with my glare. He understood. I could tell by his tone that he didn't want to agree with anything that was coming out of his mouth, but he was beginning to succumb to the conditioning as well, so he tried in vain to council me.

"Just trying to get my point across, Ashton. We have a war to fight." He said, looking away. We referred to each other's last names, having agreed when we met that numbers were too impersonal.

Our eyes met for two seconds, then I looked to the door. "I know this is dangerous…for both of us. I just believe that…bonds can make us stronger."

We stood in silence for a moment. I knew he thought I was right, but becoming Priests meant mentally shutting down all kinds of thoughts like these. We were both battling ourselves. I walked out, leaving Grayson to think some more. A deadly action.

She was in her room. I knocked. Her roommate, I believe her number was 34, answered. Once she saw me, she knew that I wanted to talk. Alone. She quickly stepped outside, nodding for me to go in. She took out portable puzzle, things we were given to efficiently kill time with, to make it look like she wasn't just waiting for me to leave. I thanked her with my eyes and quickly shuffled in.

She was lying on her cot, a bandage tightly wound about her shoulder. Her eyes met mine and a faint smile formed on her lips. She was only thirteen, and I had done this to her. When I saw that smile, I only felt pain, a deep pain from my stomach telling me that I was guilty of harming such a beautiful, strong girl.

She sensed this and motioned for me to come closer. I knelt done beside her, my face only inches from hers. I couldn't possibly tell her of my suspicion that they paired us against each other on purpose now. I couldn't get myself to do it.

"Thank you, for being there. Nobody else would've done that."

"Yeah…" I said, a bit sheepishly.

She took my chin and made me look at her. She didn't say anything at first, but I knew she would. Whenever I saw her, there was no hint of doubt in her eyes, her voice, or actions. She was always so sure of herself. This was no exception.

"I've never been held like that. No one's ever cared that much about me…I was an orphan."

I knew she shouldn't have been telling me any of this, but I'd earned her trust and I'd listen to anything she had to say.

"Apparently, my parents died fighting the vampires. I want to continue what they started themselves."

Her motives were so pure. I held her gaze in mine, wanting to hold her in my arms yet again.

"I feel that…if we're together, we can win this war."

When she said this, I couldn't help but glance at her wound. She saw me. And frowned slightly.

"You can't say it wasn't my fault." I whispered. She heard me perfectly.

"There _is _no fault. It was a duel. You won, I didn't. That's it. I'll learn from my mistakes."

"Why are you so wise? Why can't you let me take the blame? It's my fault!" I was pleading now.

It was true, she was wise, and probably stronger than I as a person. She wasn't as conflicted as I was, she was more prone to accepting this new life, which nearly broke my heart. So small, yet so strong. My mind wondered then, to the young; young that were brought up in a world plagued with an ancient war. Another wave of sorrow hit me like a bullet when I remembered them. My…family. The word seemed foreign to me.

"It's not your fault." She said to me, simply. "Can you please let this go?"

I looked into her eyes. She really didn't blame me. She really didn't want me to worry.

"I'll try." I said.

There was silence between us. She took my hand. It helped, but now I felt a new guilt. We weren't suppose to be this close, and now she told me that I was the most caring person in her life. I still wanted to be that person; I wanted to be that person forever, but now I knew about her and she knew nothing about me.

"Esper…" I called her by her last name, "I wish I'd known you sooner. I might have made life easier. My life was plenty easy."

"Tell me about it." She insisted.

"I…I have a brother. Both my parents were fine the last time I saw them. And…um…I had a girlfriend. I had…I had a lot…"

I dared to look up at her. I feared that she wouldn't understand and keep smiling, but the smile was gone. She understood that I had given up a life. An actual life, unlike her own.

"What was childhood like? What are parents like?" she said, curiously.

"Well, my brother and I would play games outside our apartment all the time with the local kids. We'd play until our parents called us back for lunch or dinner. Then we'd make some sort of mess at the table, playing with our food or something. My parents weren't terribly strict, but they did know how to tell us right from wrong."

I could tell that this life I was relaying to her was a foreign and freeing life that she had probably dreamt of for years.

I continued. "We went to church a lot. More than three times a week most weeks. It was a family affair. Owen, my brother, was never crazy about it, but…I guess I was. My father always thought I would become a…an important person. Someone to make a difference."

"Really?" she said under her breath.

"What?" I didn't understand.

"He believed in you? He really had that kind of faith in you?"

I almost froze. Had no one ever believed in her? I felt another crack form on my heart, it threatening to break into pieces.

"Yes." Was all I could say to her. I knelt in silence as her world began to spin with questions and visions of my comparatively wonderful life. I squeezed her hand to take her out of her trance. She turned her head to me, a look of realization on her face.

"We're not allowed to contact anyone from the outside."

"Yes…?" She couldn't have just realized that. Where was she going with this?

"Then, your girlfriend, what happened with her?"

…What? She wanted to know. I couldn't believe that she wanted to know.

"We…I don't know, really. I told her not to wait for me, and…she's probably with Owen."

"Your brother?" she didn't understand.

"Yes, but…that's what I wanted. That was my wish."

"Why?"

"Because our daughter needed a father. I trusted Owen to take my place."


	3. Leaving

**A/N: Thank you everyone who's been reviewing and subscribing, I didn't think this would really get any attention. **

***Yes, another short chapter, I know XP At least it gives your eyes some rest from all that rigorous reading. I know you were reading more, I can tell, fan fiction is **_**that**_** addicting. **_**I'm**_** addicted, my eyes hurt all the time! I mean, I do forget to wear my glasses most of the time, but still…***

**Also, as a side not, I know having a 20 year old and a 14 year old fall in love with each other is a bit weird, but I don't actually know their real ages and…this is in a weird futuristic vampire ridden world, so maybe it's different. (I also think that because its PriestXPriestess, none of you care :D ) Anyway, that A/N was pretty long…hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I do :)**

Before the Endless Night Falls

"I can't just wait here." Grayson said, irritated.

We were going to be initiated tomorrow, tattoos, oaths and all. We were leaving for the front lines with the rest of the senior class immediately after, and Grayson couldn't sit still.

"I'm gonna go…run a few laps or something…" he mumbled while heading out. He was anxious, and so was I. Finally, after all this rigorous training, we were going to make a difference in the war. With the rise of the Priests, we were already beginning to see a turning point in the war.

Just a few minutes after Grayson left, I heard a small knock on the door. It couldn't have been Grayson; he would've barged in. It had to be someone who was afraid of getting caught. I opened the door to see Esper looking up at me, her face blank. I opened it a bit more and she came in as I looked through the halls. The cost was clear. After I gently closed the door, I felt her arms circle me, lightly clinging to me. We didn't speak at first, although I felt that we should talk. I was the one to break the silence.

"We'll be partners, you and I, when you get to enter the war, anyway."

"But that won't be in years." I heard her say, her voice partially muffled by my chest.

"Then I'll be waiting." I replied, simply. After a moment, I tried to comfort her further. "You probably won't have to wait very long, you're more skilled then most of the novices your age. You're as good as I am, if not better." This was all true, although it didn't seem to do much good, he face still buried in my chest.

"Who will I spar with then? No one can match me." Also true, but I could tell that she had more on her mind. I didn't answer as to signal for more thoughts, which I received. "Who will worry about me here? Who will sit with me at night just to be with me? Who will _know_ me like you do?"

I thought about her words, hugging her a bit closer. No one, I wanted to say. No one will worry like I do; no one will sit with you in silence and contentment, happy just being with you; no one will know you and love you like I do. But I couldn't possibly say that in words.

She looked up at me and somehow knew what I was thinking. _No one._

We stood in silence for another moment, taking in our last minutes of being together for what most likely would be years. I cared for her deeply although I knew it was dangerous for both of us. I was falling in love her and I knew it, but my future Priesthood forbade those kinds of thoughts and feelings. We had to take an oath of celibacy, we both had to…but that didn't mean I couldn't care about her. I would restrain myself, but I would never stop caring about her.

This all made me think of what I was officially leaving behind besides Esper. Owen, Shannon…Lucy. Shannon, what would she think of me if I ever did return? I couldn't go back…not after everything that's happened. Not after my Priesthood, the kind of love we had would be forbidden; the kind of love I was harboring for Esper was forbidden. Well technically, not yet.

"Ashton…" I heard her say, looking up at me again.

"Yes?" my reply is almost a whisper.

She didn't say another word, but slowly wrapped her arms around my neck. Why, I didn't care, I was lost in her touch. Her embrace felt too right, like we belonged like this. I wondered if this feeling could possibly be a sin, but how could it? It felt pure and unwavering, like my faith in God himself. But I knew, if a trainer saw us like this, we'd be torn apart and severely punished. Was this what rebellion felt like? I didn't know, but I didn't really want to find out, all I wanted to think about was her. I would give anything to have this moment last.

She had the power to read my mind. She looked into my tired eyes and saw what was lingering. This would be her first kiss, I knew, and probably her last. Most likely my last as well. It was a sobering thought, knowing how effortlessly beautiful and genuine she was.

She leaned up slightly and my lips met hers in a gentle kiss. I hadn't felt like this in ages, I didn't think I still could kiss. I could feel her relax in my arms, the sudden nervous tension she had possessed a second ago gone forever. Her hands moved to cup my face, her touch almost too soft to feel.

I heard heavy footsteps and knew who they belonged to. I didn't want to separate from her, but I had to. I backed away as slowly as possible and walked backwards to the door, my eyes never leaving her gaze. I grasped the doorknob and felt the tug from the other side. This was a code we had created to avoid walk-ins like this. He understood immediately and waited for my all clear.

I sighed, my eyes looking to the ground. I could feel her strong eyes on me as I gradually grew weaker, waiting for me to tell her to go. What a bitter goodbye this would be, and what a terrible scar it had potential to leave on both of us.


	4. Reuniting

**A/N: yes, back in the habit! I haven't written anything in like**_**, a week**_**, which actually isn't that bad, but still. Anyway, short-ish chapter, but good-ish chapter ;)**

Before the Endless Night Falls

It's only been two years. I know, _only_. It feels like I've been out here for two _lifetimes_ it's been so long. If we weren't fighting for God, and winning by the looks of it, I'd say this was hell.

But when I heard who the new recruits were, coming fresh out of the academy, time seemed to be of no relevance. I felt older, very much older—yet I felt a youthful pang at my heart, like I was still that same 18 year old doing my best at the academy because I'd been chosen by God himself; trying so hard to feel like I belonged somewhere. And I did. I belonged with her, I knew it then and I know it now. The separation was what kept me alive; the hope of seeing her again giving me strength above all circumstances.

I remember a time that I felt myself leaving my body, the pain I had just been enduring gone from me. I could feel God willing me to him, saying that I'd done my job, and for a moment…I believed him. But just then, my memory of her pierced at me like the vampire who had just nearly ripped me to shreds. Her eyes willed me back to life; my will to forge on for her kept me stable and alive. I couldn't give up, she wouldn't want it that way. We were partners and I was determined to see the day that I would fight by her side.

I woke up in our makeshift infirmary, Grayson staring at me. He was so ecstatic to see me alive, he almost hugged me, but with other Priests around, he sufficed with a firm grip of my weak hand. I wondered if I had possibly changed my destiny that day. I was so close to heaven's light I could feel it. Can it be that God willed me to trudge on? It must be, or I wouldn't be here. But my feelings for her…I've been told feelings like mine betray our faith as Priests. But, how can that be if God has permitted me life? Alive and thinking of her…I doubt I'll find out soon.

She came one day. It was a day I thought might never come.

I was injured shortly after hearing of her future arrival. Grayson said I was losing my mind out there, that the heat must have gotten to me. I don't remember, but he told me of my recklessness. No, my friend, it wasn't the heat. It was the fear. It was the happiness, and then the fear of my happiness.

So I'd been resting. I was sitting by myself that night, on a ledge just earshot away from base, just in case I started talking to myself. And then she found me.

I could hardly see her in the darkness, but I knew. Maybe it was how she walked, or maybe her unique shape, but to me, she was different from the rest. I held my breath for some unknown reason, as if her walking towards me would drown me.

She was only sixteen. God, younger than I was before I even started at the academy. How much had changed during our two years apart? How much was the same? My curiosity burned in my chest, my heart beat racing faster than when in battle. I was terrified. Terrified of my feelings taking over, terrified that I'd lose her in battle…terrified that she didn't love me anymore.

She sat next to me. I felt her arm graze mine and a shiver went down my spine. I sensed her calm. It made me calm. What was this power she had over me?

I dared to look at her, my newfound composure giving me courage. She turned her head in that same instant and our eyes met. I don't know how long we stared at each other, but it was _agonizing. _I wanted so much to hear her voice, but my heart was suddenly caught in my throat, preventing me to speak. I examined her face, studying the rust red tattoo on her forehead. _Was that painful? Did you cry? _I couldn't help but picture her in that chair, gripping the arm rests instead of my hands.

I was suddenly craving her touch and I reached for her hand. Our separate trances seemed to end once my hand met hers and she looked down, slowly twisting her fingers into mine. _What had changed _I kept asking myself. But how could I find out? I had to speak, but she beat me to it.

"Your injured." She observed, her tone a bit flat line, but concerned. I looked at my bandaged leg as if I hadn't known prior. I looked back at her wondering if I should tell her that I'd been distracted in battle or not. I decided not to.

"I've had worse." _Missing you._ Once I thought it, I realized how cheesy that was, but was still a bit regretful for not saying it. Was I a romantic now? A vow breaking, vampire killing, hopeless romantic? Maybe.

She got a little closer to me. She wrapped her arm under mine, re-lacing our fingers. I felt my heart stop, conflicted. I would give in without regrets, after all, she was the only reason I was alive.

"Esper," I whispered. She looked at me intently. "…I've been waiting for you."

Her reply was not quick. "How has it been? Are you well?"

I knew what she meant. Any man or woman in war will be affected by it, most in the negative. I was lonely and restless. But that wasn't because of the war. Now, maybe I could fight knowing that I had a greater purpose. Maybe my restlessness would die with her arrival.

"I am now." I said simply, squeezing her hand slightly, as if to pump the blood between us, as if we were one. I held her eyes in mine as we both shared the same thoughts.

"I've missed you." She finally said, her eyes glazed with tears. I couldn't control myself after that, it was just too much. I spoke my mind without a second of thought, never regretting it.

"I love you."

Our eyes were locked. There was no world beyond ours. I knew she approved of me with this gaze. Yes, life would get complicated, but we both believed that bonds made people stronger. Nothing would tear them apart, not now.


	5. Losing

**A/N: I wish this could be more accurate, but the movie still isn't on DVD and I don't really remember everything perfectly, so I've done the best I can at the moment and I hope you enjoy**

**Also, thanx to those of you subscribing and reviewing, and for just plain reading. I love hearing from you :)**

Before the Endless Night Falls

My eyes were red from the dust, she had told me. It only takes a year to get used to the sting, I said back. That was the last thing I said before she fell asleep in my arms.

For some time, she had just looked at me, studying me while the others were in their tents trying to rest before we made our strike against the hive. I knew what she was thinking; I was thinking the same thing. She gave me this look every time before a battle. _What if this is the last time I ever see you?_ I hated the thought, but war was reality, and death had a grip on every soldier. These were the nights that I would hold her closer and kiss her more often, never giving into the fear of being caught. Neither of us were afraid of punishment or death, but we were both admittedly selfish in our want for each other.

We've discussed this before; our sinful thoughts. But we've never reached a conclusion that made sense. We are warriors of God, chosen by God to fight for God, living for God…and wanting more. To be fair, neither of us fully trusted the clergy, we never did. Maybe their rules were too harsh; they had to be wrong about things like this. But if it wasn't for the clergy, we would never have met. Together we would wondered whether life would be better or worse if we hadn't been chosen. We both denied it, our warrior selves not able to see life without doing our part in the battle front. But truthfully, I only kept one secret from her, that part of me _did_ believe that I would've been happier if I had nothing to do with the war…or _her_ even. But I would never tell her anything like that.

The sun was coming up now; the heat rising; threatening to make the day even more gruesome than the last. Even though it grew hotter every second, I could not separate myself from my partner, although she too was a great source of heat. I cherished every moment alone we could spare, no doubt she did the same.

She'd come only a year ago with new recruits, half of them already dead or dying. It took Grayson that entire year to realize that what Esper and I have is beneficial to our well being, so he understands me now.

I felt her stir. My eyes rested on her closed eyelids until they opened, looking up at me and locking in my gaze. Not long after, we heard our team call in formation. We were about to leave for the mission. The mission; the mission of utmost importance in which we could not fail. Part of me couldn't believe that we were actually going _in_ there. We'd been told repeatedly that if we succeed, it would be the biggest turning point for all of mankind. _We can't fail._

My eyes wondered from the camp ahead to the hive, having slept away from the camp to avoid suspcion, (although I'm sure some have already speculated. I was wary, a fear sparking in the pit of my stomach. I stared at the hive, trying to concur that fear; trying to smother it from within, like we were trined to do. I still stared into the horizon as Esper drew away from me and stood up, dusting herself off. She looked in my direction, then looked back as she heard Grayson approach. I got up when meeting Grayson's eyes.

"You ready?" he asked.

We both nodded the affirmative.

I noticed his jaw clench. He was nervous, but dead set on winning this war. He would prove to the world what he was capable of. He would show the clergy his relentless power. This worried me immensely, ever since we were just cadets. He secretly hated the clergy for being so ruthlessly unkind to their "prodigies" and "chosen ones." To us. I'd known of his relent towards _something_ while in the academy, but it wasn't until recently that he told me the specifics of his anger. After he'd understood my connection with Esper, he didn't understand why our love was forbidden. Neither did I, but the fact enraged him while it only slightly concerned me. I accepted our place, but I feared Grayson didn't possess that kind of grace.

…

Our objective was to serve as a distraction until the real ambush came. Our small team made our way to the Queen. Death reared its ugly head at every turn, danger saturating the air. I'd never been so terrified and so inspired at the same time. Adrenaline pumped through my blood like never before. I kept an eye on Esper, knowing she was also keeping an eye on me. I looked over to Grayson, who was in front. His eyes never looked back, he was too focused on the initiative. He was a good leader, not the best vampire killer, but he never backed down and had some of the best instincts out of the fleet.

I wasn't surprised that we were found out. And so soon. We fought as long as we could, but as soon as we lost two from our team of seven, we knew we had to bail. That should have been enough time for the rest of the fleet. I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. Lord, that sounded bad. I heard a woman's scream. Damn, one more down. Then, Grayson fell behind. I heard him gasp as he fell to the slime ridden dirt. My mind was racing as I turned back, my heart felt like a rock pounding against my chest. I didn't waste time reaching out to him. His eyes were wild in fear as we prolonged the inevitable, clinging each others palms. I could feel my last shreds of hope growing thinner as my grip on his hand began to slip. I felt his fingertips leave mine and I could no longer contain my cries as I heard his disappearing further into the tunnel.

No, not Grayson, not my closest friend; my closest brother. Emotion crashed over me. Loss and defeat numbed my senses as I barely felt hands and arms pull me out into the serene light of human existence. The heat didn't touch my nerves as we huddled from the explosions. My mind was hazy as the fleet came in and won the battle. Everything went black once I realized Esper's voice was ringing in my ears.

...

I woke in my tent, but the ground was different. We'd moved out. Where? And how long had I been asleep? I sat up slowly, chest pain seizing me into full consciousness. My hand shot up to meet my heart and I suddenly remembered everything. Grayson was gone…where was Esper? She had to be close by. She was safe, wasn't she? I vaguely remembered her pulling me out of that tunnel, but had she made it after that? I heard my voice call her name, still a bit hazy and detached from the world. I wasn't aware of the worry in my voice until she came in, her eyes finding mine.

Once she was certain no one could see us through the opening in my tent, she embraced me, holding my head to her shoulder, leaning my body against hers. I felt somewhat like a child, but I couldn't complain while in her arms and in such a weak state. It comforted me to know she wasn't hurt, and I was grateful, but still, Grayson's death haunted me. Loss was something we were trained to overcome, and quickly. Was it my attachment to him, the very thing _he_ had warned _me_ about, that was the worst sin I could commit as a soldier of God?

I tried not think about it, my body still weak, my mind swimming. Her touch steadied me in minutes, her voice warming my ear. My eyes stung with tears, but I held them back. I buried my face in her neck and she understood. She told me that we had prevailed; we were so much closer to winning the war.

I didn't know what to say, so I didn't say anything. I didn't know what to feel, so I tried to forget. I tried so hard to relax and just be with Esper for this one moment of weakness, but I couldn't. Something changed in me that day, and something left from my spirit that made me actually feel…like a Priest.


	6. Hurting

**A/N: YES! I finally got the DVD! I want to watch it today, but I don't know when. Anyway, this chapter is very melancholy and highly T rated, so I hope you enjoy it's deepness.**

Before the Endless Night Falls

The war was actually ending. We'd cornered them.

We'd actually done it.

The feeling of triumph spread throughout the city quickly.

I felt no triumph. Not many Priests did.

Peace was short lived. People were still paranoid as the church tried to convince them of our good fortune. But the people were still afraid. In actuality, most of them had never even seen a vampire with their own eyes. Words and stories had been engraved in their minds and fear was a necessity.

So they chose to fear us. Their saviors.

At first, we were fully accepted as heroes, but that cloud faded quicker than even I expected. We soon became outcasts; misunderstood; inexperienced; antisocial even. No one knew what to do or say to us, it's as if our sacrifices meant nothing to them, _nothing._

_Sacrifices._ They had no comprehension of the meaning of that word. Not from my perspective, anyway.

War had changed me. War had changed us all. I was fully aware of my depression, unwilling to even fight it. Even for Esper.

For the first few months, we lived in the same apartment. We convinced the clergy it was because jobs were scarce and that adjusting into civilization would be easier with someone we knew; with someone who understood. It was all true, but I still believe they had their suspicions. A few followed our example and found it much easier to cope.

It was a sort of peace. We had jobs that didn't pay well thatworked us to the bone from morning to night, then we came home, ate dinner, and went to bed. No vampires, no hiding our affection, and little conversation. It was pleasant at best. My depression was only slight then, my listlessness calmed by her knowing eyes. She would try to comfort me when we settled for the night. I'd be half asleep and she'd whisper in my ear things that she supposed I needed to here.

_You are strong and alive. It is God's will that you live, and it gives me happiness._

Anything to make you happy. That's what I used to strive for everyday when we were young and in training. To make you smile ever so slightly. To hold you whenever you were overwhelmed. It seems we've traded places, my perspective now just as bleak as yours used to be. And you, trying to hold onto me so that I didn't slip away from what we have; what we've been waiting for.

_You are brave for facing the world every day. _

Young and naïve, we used to be, not brave. It's not bravery now, we're stuck here; trapped. Before, I dreamed that we could come out of this war and not have to deal with the pain of loss and isolation. Of forbidden love.

It's us against the world now.

_I know it hurts, it hurts me too._

Hurt. Pain. I thought we were done with pain. Apparently, it never goes away. Pain doesn't just come with grit and heat, vampires and blades, blood and loss, it comes with relentlessness. God's wrath or anyone else's. As I listen to her words—to the now sorrowful tone of her voice—the throbbing in my heart overpowers the fatigue I had from my hard day at work and my listlessness altogether. I roll over and firmly take her in my arms. She seems grateful for my emotion and returns the intensity, one of her hands now reassuringly grasping the back of my head, approving as I dig my face into the crook of her neck.

We were like that for some time, until my mind could no longer hold back my primal instincts to become closer to her. That first night of passion was enough for some time. Most nights, we just held each other, our memories haunting us to the point of insomnia. We could talk about our dreams, our nightmares, our memories. Sometimes, only sometimes, when our minds let what was locked inside our hearts free. If it wasn't for our talks, as if we were in confessional, I would have easily forgotten that we were both just as vulnerable to this world. We were experiencing the same grief and underestimation. But when she came home every day, she stayed strong for me. I don't think I could have loved her more.

And then we were separated.

It wasn't sudden, but it was, secretly, a shock to me. Not because they ordered us apart—that we both knew was inevitable—but because she later told me that this was not the first time she'd been warned.

She told me the night they informed us, when we were getting ready for bed. I was changing into night clothes while she sat on the cot. Her words were strangely tentative, as if she had committed a small crime. Maybe to her, keeping something this personal from me was a crime, especially because it had something to do with me. It had everything to do with me.

"Almost a week after you left, the head masters brought me in. They told me that if I didn't tell them the whole truth about us, then God would punish me."

I was silent for a moment. "Just because we were close?" _They threatened you with God? In His name?_ We knew the consequences, and yet—maybe this new life we seemed to live, maybe this was punishment.

"They had suspicions that we were too close."

Well, we were, but we were very good at hiding it. "Why bother us now?" That almost sounded idiotic. We were sinning and I half expected the clergy not to care, even though we weren't on active duty. We were still Priests. We were never off duty, something the clergy didn't understand. Something no one understood.

Esper didn't answer that question. She stood and walked the few feet to me, resting her hands on my bare chest to take my full attention. It succeeded, my eyes reluctantly resting in her gaze.

"I told them that you were my partner, the closest in comparison to my skills. They believed me and decided to have me train for only two more years. The youngest soldier." She almost whispered that last part, as if the memory was too much for her. And maybe it was.

I closed my eyes, memories filling my mind, old feelings filling my heart. She had only been sixteen when she entered the war. She was twenty-one now. I gently, almost chastely, wrapped my arms around her, my eyes still closed. She mimicked my gentle touch, as if this was our first embrace. I wanted to forgive her, but I knew there was more to the story.

"Is that all?" I whispered, close to her ear. I felt her take in a breath as she sunk into me.

"I was assigned to a different post. They didn't want us as partners. They thought that bonds weakened soldiers."

"And yet we fought for four years together, and they didn't notice you'd switched posts?" My voice was very thin. This information was a lot to take in._ She had disobeyed military orders_.

"I know they noticed. They were waiting for one of us to die."

"How can you know that? How can you say that?" I asked, pulling away just enough so that I could see her eyes. I was taken aback by her harsh words. It actually sounded just like the clergy, to wait for God's punishment, but had she really concealed these thoughts from me all this time?

"How many do you think knew?" I asked, my voice suddenly hoarse. My eyes were welling up for some reason. _It's us against the world._

She knew what I was referring to. Our company, how many knew besides Grayson? "I don't know. But if anyone did, the clergy would be doing more than just separating us."

I sighed. I was annoyed, depressed, anxious, and confused. I bordered on the edge of anger for a second, but tried to remember y place. I realized that I had none.

"Where do they want one of us to move?" I ended up saying.

"To the next sector."

I held in the curse, but my face said it all. "I'll move."

"No, I'll move." She shook me a little with that reaction, a bit defensive.

"Why?" I knew exactly why. She was too selfless, always thinking of me before herself.

"So you can be closer to Owen."

I lowered my head so that it was resting on her shoulder. She was too kind. Sometimes I hated that about her. She was brutally emotionless with others and a vampire's worst nightmare, but could melt my heart when we were alone. I suppose that should have made me feel good, but somehow, it only made me feel worse. I know that if my eighteen year old self were here to see me now, he would be ashamed. He tried to take over in that moment; tried to regain what I knew we were losing.

We kissed, deeply and without restraint. She gave no protest, actually grabbing my hips and pulling me closer, reading me like a book as usual. She too wanted nothing more but to stay together; we were truly free only when together. But in our current circumstance, living was torment and "together" had never been enough. "Together" in a world where we were forbidden to love was not "together." Tonight was for letting sin be sin, letting love be love, and for letting go of what we had clung to for so long.

When I woke up in the middle of the night, I saw her getting dressed. She was going to leave me while I slept. Part of my heart ached, but strangely, the effect wasn't as painful as I thought it would be.

"We could leave the city." I said, my voice husky, the eighteen years old in my heart speaking for me. "We could run, far away from here."

"You know we can't do that." She said in a strangely calm voice, as if we were talking about a normal subject. "We could never get away with it. Besides, living on our own in the desert is suicide."

She made a point that I'd already thought about. It was impossible to escape our torture.

I involuntarily reached my hand out to her, like a child, begging for her to come back to bed. She was half dressed, and had already started packing the little she had by the looks of it. She somewhat reluctantly abided to my plea and laid down next to me. She looked into my eyes as I scooted closer to her.

"I'm not done with you." I half whispered. I really wasn't. But now that I knew she would be gone before I woke up next, I was ready for the separation.

She seemed to understand this and made herself comfortable against me. "I don't know when I'll see you next. It may be a long time."

I didn't reply with words. I only held her tighter and tried not to kiss her. I gave her everything I had left just a few hours ago, and I couldn't bear to go back. If I kissed her now; if I touched her anywhere else but her middle, I would never let her leave; never let her go. But our time was almost up.

That morning, I was alone and cold.

Every day I asked God why I was alive; what more purpose I possibly had left. Then I asked for forgiveness, for I had sinned. My everyday in the war I had sinned, I couldn't stop thinking, doubting, asking, praying. I was so confused; conflicted. What did my life mean? Why wouldn't the nightmares go away?

Faith.

Work.

Security.

I tried to live by those rules.

I surrendered myself to the void of only truly trusting God and no one else. I hardly spoke, trying to conceal what little sanity I had left. I tried not to think or reminisce, but no matter how much I tried, I thought of Owen often. I wrote to him sometimes, but not much. I had already trained myself not to think of Shannon or Lucy.

I thought of Esper some nights, and for those brief moments, I felt a small peace within me that was able to lull me to sleep. Sleep was no sanctuary. I had no sanctuary. Not for many years.

**Yeah, melancholy. I'm not sure where to go from here, but if you want more, just ask. I'm sure if you wanted, I could think of a few more chapters.**


	7. Just the Beginning

**A/N: Thanx to those of you who willed it so, there will be more to come! So stay tuned, as always.**

**Also, watched the commentary for the movie the other day. Most entertaining commentary I've ever watched :) I recommend it to all fans. It's by the director, the screen writer, Paul Bettany and Maggie Q. They never run out of things to talk about and its quite funny. Paul Battany's a hopeless romantic too! I'm not the only one!**

**FYI, for some reason, I switch POV's from Priest to omniscient in the middle of the chapter and I didn't realize it until I uploaded, so I hope that's not too annoying. ****Anyway, enjoy the chapter.**

Before the Endless Night Falls

_Finally._

The word seemed to echo in my consciousness as I became lost in the sight of my daughter, cradled in my lap. I pushed through the pain in my body, mainly my freshly stabbed and strained shoulder. People think Priests are invincible; that God protects us in every way. It is true, God gives us much strength, but not nearly enough to be invincible from all wounds—wounds of the body or of the mind.

I'm not thinking when I raise my hand to smooth the hair from her closed eyes. The pain never dulls, I feel it even in this bliss. I can feel the hot wind drying the blood spilling from my shoulder; I can feel the dirt coating itself on my wounds. Worry of my own health is far from thought as I wait for Lucy to regain her strength. I know she's alive, I can feel her steady breathing; her relaxed inhales and exhales as she lies in my arms.

She opened her eyes. She looked at me. I knew then, that she accepted me. She knew I loved her, she understood why I had to leave her all those years ago. I can hardly believe this feelings. This feeling…I feel free, like this is how I'm suppose to feel. No more do I have to keep secrets about my longing to know my own flesh and blood. No longer do I have to believe it is sin to think such things. I can finally be a father.

I heard Hicks come from behind. It was then when I realized just how much of Lucy's life I've missed. She's fallen in love. Hicks had said that Owen didn't know, but I knew better. Owen knew, he was too good of a father not to.

I let her go. I knew she needed him right now, so it wasn't as painful a separation as I thought it would be. I also trusted Hicks now. He's grown more mature, I've noticed. He can kill vampires and think clearly while doing so. I can leave Lucy with him and have faith he'll take good care of her.

Now that Lucy was gone from my lap, terror lifted me from the ground as adrenaline pumped through my veins. Was Priestess alive? Had she survived? I remember…when I saw her charging at the train, I didn't fight the instinct to cry out. I remembered everything we'd been through and how ashamed I was of myself for nearly wanting to forget I'd ever been in love with her in the first place. I remember when I laid eyes on her for the first time in years. We were in the hive when I wrestled her into the wall, thinking she was a vampire. Even before I flashed my light onto her face, I recognized her movements. This was someone of my skill, probably sent to find me. But nothing could have prepared me for what I'd seen I was shocked to see her, but in the deepest reaches of my heart…I think I was overjoyed. To see her right in front of me, to touch her—even if it was defensive, I was touching her. She wasn't just a phantom in my dreams, she was real to me.

I remember when we were separated, the emptiness that I believed God could fill; the punishment I thought I'd deserved. I remember when she'd entered the war, disobeying direct orders while we inadvertently proved the clergy wrong about weakness. I remember our first kiss two years before hand and the listlessness I felt after being sent away from her.

I couldn't lose her, not now, not when we'd just reunited. I've lost so much, and even if we never talked after the war, I took comfort that she was alive. I always took comfort that my family was alive, although I never visited them.

_She thought you'd come back. _I couldn't, it didn't seem right. I made a vow of celibacy, so I couldn't love Shannon the way I once had. If I had lived with them, we all would've suffered. Both Owen and Shannon would separately mourn the loss of who I had been, and I would notice. Besides, we still would've had to keep the secret from Lucy; We would've had to live with lying to her face. And as much as I _wanted_ to see her, I was afraid. If I had told that to you, Owen, you would have tried to talk me out of my fear. You would have told me that it was ridiculous to fear seeing my daughter—perhaps even making a connection with her—because that was nothing compared to killing vampires. But in many ways, brother, watching my daughter grow up with you would have been harder than merely killing vampires. Much harder.

I stumbled when trying to walk, but I trudged through it. My body ached and my wounds pounded, blood pumping like mad in my ears. Fatigue wanted to take me down, but I wouldn't have it, not until I knew where Priestess was. Dead or alive.

I know now that it was only moments until I saw her figure emerge from the decimation, but it felt somewhat like eternity for me. She looked confident; unharmed. Her eyes were unwavering as she locked on me, her energy a perfect balance of pride and spiritual strength. Thank the Lord in Heaven. For a split second, I wanted to run to her. Obviously, the only thing I'd be doing for some time is limping. I'd like to think that my fatigue was the only thing holding me back, but it wasn't. I was still wary of where we stood. As Priests. As partners? As…something more? But I was the one who'd rejected her. Now that I see her alive, my fears chased away by her presence, I only wanted to make it up to her. I only wanted her.

I looked up, having seen a shadow floating just in front of me. A black hat fell at my feet. I wondered and knew. This wasn't the end.

…

"I've got some friends that'll go with us." Hicks said as Priestess tended to Priest's wounds. "They know where to find a couple Priests, too. They know a lot of people. We could be our own vampire killin' team." Hicks started talking faster as he stated making more impromptu plans.

The two Priests locked eyes, having a short and wordless conversation. They were both wary of bringing in more loose cannons like Hicks, but they needed a team. They also didn't doubt that they'd find some Priests out in the wastelands, they had known a few that fled the cities in desperation. Priest spoke first.

"When can you get a hold of them?"

"Just a phone call away."

Again, the two Priests looked at each other.

"I have to go back to Cathedral City." Priest nearly mumbled. "To show the council."

Priestess thought about this. The council didn't yet know about the deaths of the other Priests she'd originally set out with. She was technically still on their side. With one more glance at Priest, she knew they were thinking the same thing. Even if he was an outlaw, she'd be able to get him in.

"When?" she asked, done bandaging his shoulder.

"Now." He said plainly.

"Now?" Lucy exclaimed, having been listening to them from the kitchen. "You can't go now! You're badly wounded!"

"I've been through worse." He quickly explained, as if it was enough to ease his daughter's obvious disagreement. "So has Priestess." He got up at this, sliding his sleeves back on and adjusting his hood. He went to the door and motioned for Lucy to follow him.

Once outside, Lucy gently leaned into him, curling his arms around him as he did the same. She could feel the relief in his bones as he embraced her, kissing the top of her head. She'd never known his longing, but now, she felt it full heartedly. Owen had always been a great father, and even when she was mad at him, she knew it was only because he loved her, but this…this was too right and too tragic. She suddenly felt that she was responsible for his pain. He was a Priest, and a damn good one. She knew what their lives were like; she knew the boundaries and the sacrifices from what Owen had reluctantly told her on occasion. She'd only ever known Priest through Owens' stories. From those stories, she knew how much Owen loved his brother and how much he missed him. Only a few times, she'd overheard her parents talk about him; how much they missed him; how much the clergy changed him.

"As long as he's out there, no one's safe." Priest said, his voice low.

Lucy looked up into his eyes, trying to find a reason to argue. But she already knew. There was none. "But—" she stammered, "I want to _know_ you. We've only just met."

"I know." He said through his teeth, taking her face in his hands. "But I need you safe."

At that moment, Lucy realized that Priest had always been fighting _for her_. His deceit towards the clergy was an easy one because he had never been fighting for them. It had always been for her, it was the only way he could ever show his affection.

"Come back." She said, choking back the urge to cry. She was stronger than this. She would become stronger. For him. "Come back for me. "

"Always."

**Ok, hope you liked that. I actually loosely based that last part off of a deleted scene. Frikkin** **awesome scene, sad they had to let it go.**


	8. Turning

**A/N: Dudes, sorry a thousand times about the terribly long wait, I really have been wanting to continue this for a while. I was also just about to write an entirely new chapter when I found the first half of this deep in the caverns of my hard drive. Wow, I'm pretty smart.**

**Anyway, this is a flashback chapter for the most part, so sorry if you were waiting for the story's continuation, cause that'll have to wait some. But I know you'll like this chapter because…**

**It's in Grayson's POV! (Critique needed and appreciated. I'm usually confident with my POV's, but this one was quite hard to write in character.) Thanx to ****ThornManiaLilyCharliZorianna**** for reminding me how much Grayson really should have a bigger part in this story. Anyway, enjoy :)**

Before the Endless Night Falls

The clergy had always angered me. Mother said to never let my temper take control, so I left with as much control as I could muster. It wasn't until years later that control was an amazing thing to possess.

I was only thirteen years old when they came.

The scene is plastered in my memory in loud splotches of color, then suddenly in a lame black and white. My mother went to the door, strange robed men standing outside it, a look of content written on their faces like God was whispering to them at that very moment. Their faces were rugged and brown, burnt from the sun, harsher than my own shade. The sun shone brightly behind them, making their features mere shadows in daylight.

I hadn't always been wary of God's existence; it wasn't until the death of my father that I could no longer grip the faith that my mother always had so blindly, _God_ having taken my father away so suddenly. Mother said there was always meaning; a reason for everything. How could there be meaning in his death? He didn't deserve it; such fate was unmerciful. Mugged, and then killed for fighting back. He was a strong man, a man of faith as resilient as mother's. If God truly cared for him, he would have let him live.

They said something about the Lord and the saviors and the war our meek soldiers were fighting every day. It was when they said my name that I actually started listening, their muffled voices now a clear strike to my very eardrum. And because my mother's sweet disposition never changed since the opening of the door, I could not contain the fear bubbling up within me. I remember the blinding yellow of her dress, the sunlight bouncing off of it as I felt myself get sick. I'd wanted no place in the war, having been taught of vampires and their devilish, monstrous ways. They were mindless fiends of the night, bread to kill. There was no way they were dragging me into that war.

Her back was turned from me, her body loose. Not stiff with surprise, not shaking from cries or even laughter, she merely treated their request to send me away as if they were asking for eggs or sugar.

She turned finally, my memory then turning very grey. Her face was relieved for some reason. She tried to hide it, but I could see very clearly. I felt betrayed, and right then and there I wanted to run. Run from this war, from the city, from humans and vampires alike. God, if you are really out there, then why have you made me so miserable? What is the meaning of my life? To amuse you?

So with a bag containing only my bare essentials, I was escorted to the outskirts of the city where the boot camp was waiting.

It wasn't as prestigious as I thought it would be. It looked like a converted prison with crosses mounted on every wall. If it wasn't for the digital clock in the car, I wouldn't have been able to tell what time it was because of the city's constant overcast. Filthy.

12:29. No wonder the place looked deserted, there was probably a curfew. Damn.

They assigned me a number after spitting the rules at me. 14. They would from now on address me as _fucking 14_ until I was christened a savior. It was then when I realized that my life was over, that God had created me to be a fucking slave.

The boarding house rules were insane.

No outside clothing or accessories can be worn to promote individuality

No one of the opposite sex can enter eithers' assigned rooms

No outside food, drink or materials.

No contact with anyone on the outside

No cursing

Damn it.

The rooms were underground some, unfortunately. I was exhausted by the time I reached the bottom of the stairs. The hallways were very plain and narrow, barely only room for three people to stand next to each other. Maybe that was the idea.

When I unlocked the door to my room, it was empty. There were too beds on each side, so I assumed I was getting a roommate eventually. There were two small desks pushed together in the middle of the room, two small lamps, and a bookshelf only holding the bible. Nothing looked like it belonged; it was like they found this "furniture" at a rummage sale.

The next day, training started. How they knew I was better than good with a knife was beyond me, but why they thought it was a "gift from God" was even more farfetched. They brainwashed the others, who were either just as old as I or younger. Their faith persuaded them; the "superiors" only enabling their weaknesses, acting as the trigger. They told us we would be unstoppable and honorable weapons in the heat of this eternal war. After days of bone crunching circuits, we were led to believe we would be invincible. After weeks of severe blood spilling drills, we were taught to believe that vampires would cower before us. After years of no compassion, of dissuasion of making actual relationships among us, we were told that our teamwork would prevail against all evil. That this was God's will.

Number 15 died on me after five years. He and his partner, 11, died in a simulation. Rapid blood loss after fatal slit to the throat. Good thing they died here and not in the field. Well, that's what the superiors would have said if they could. I remember trying to be friendly with him, too, but he was the quietest bastard I'd ever met. Read the bible for fun. Unknown to me at the time, the next day would be a pivotal one.

The next day, Ashton walked into my life. The new number 11.

I was honestly surprised the see my new roommate. Apparently, the messenger was too slow and didn't get to me in time to warn me after lunch. He was lying atop the blankets of the bed to the left of the room, staring up at the ceiling. He was tall; too tall for a new recruit. I was expecting a boy maybe in his tweens, early teens even. He looked more like eighteen he was so tall, and from the lamp just behind his head, I could see the stubble on his face.

He looked at me with far away eyes. I held that stare, wondering what he would do. It was instantly that we understood each other. Although he'd just been here two seconds, we knew each other to be equals. We could see the hell we'd been through, through our eyes.

It was only two years after when we were assigned to be christened. He was that good. And by then, after seeing him do what he does, it pulled me into the whole "gift from God" thing. That was the only explanation I could willingly believe. He was completely inexperienced before this; never held a blade or a staff in his life, never experimented with martial arts. Ever. He was a miracle if I ever saw him.

And his partner, the fourteen year old, what a gift. They looked like two pieces in a puzzle they were so close. They were always together, and sometimes I'd tag along just for the company. I'd always be the one to initiate conversation, neither very talkative, which was nice sometimes, made me remember what spirituality should be. One night, he even told me about his feelings for her, which was forbidden. I didn't care, though, and he knew it. I'd loved once. My family used to love me. Now love meant nothing to me. But somehow, he knew that I'd understand. And I did.

"But its sin." His voice was the very essence of sadness. He was practically sweating in it, drenched in his own remorse.

"Shit, I don't believe in sin. Heaven or hell, you'd fight for her, right?" I thought myself to be the angel and the devil combined.

"Yes."

"You'd fight to be by her side, to keep her safe?"

"Yes?"

"And how's it make you feel?"

"…Wonderful. Like my life isn't just meant for being a weapon."

"Then relax. Love her if you love her, just don't let the wannabe prodigies know." That was my phrase for the "superiors."

He was the only one I knew that I could speak freely with, vice versa. We were each other's outlet for everything. If we were mad, we'd scream things at each other that didn't make sense. We'd scream until we laughed, we laughed until we cried, we cried until we had nothing left in us. It was the only way we could feel real emotion. For me, anyway.

He had Esper, and sometimes, I guarded our door to make sure no one discovered them. I have no idea what they did in there, but I doubt it was ever past first base. They were just happy to be breaking one house rule let alone a vow of celibacy. Either way, I felt like protecting them. Whatever emotions we can hold onto was always one of my priorities, I was satisfied we were still able to feel. They were trying to make us weapons—robots, unfeeling in our quest to save humanity. How could we save us all if we forbidden to have any outer ties, any freedom at all?

But years past, and on the front, nothing seemed to matter anymore. We weren't fighting to save anyone. We weren't fighting for God. We weren't even fighting for our own survival. We were just out doing what we'd been trained to do. For most of us, killing vampires was easy. Easy as breathing.

Ashton and I hardly talked outside of missions, but we were more or less together most of the time. He needed Esper, I knew, but he didn't show it. He changed in those years. We both did. Our faith kept us going, his having rubbed off on me somehow, and we prayed together. We prayed for our success and for the salvation of our kind like we actually gave a shit about the rest of them.

We were brothers then. We'd sworn to protect each other about all else. And for a while, that was how it was.

Until that fateful day my eyes were truly opened. The day I was saved from the hell of humanity I was born in.

I was badly wounded, their claws and teeth raking into my flesh as they dragged me further and further into the darkness. I begged Him to make death quick—but He wasn't listening. My sins laid before me in a bloody haze, my life flashing before my eyes, I was a mess of pain and sorrow. And that's when it happened. My savior—my queen—released me into a world of instinct; a world where I felt alive and powerful. In just five minutes, I had become the most powerful life form the world had ever seen. When for years I'd trained and was never close to becoming this unstoppable.

Power, I then understood, was the first step to control. And in that moment, I was in control of the most lethal army of creatures humanity had never been able to extinguish.

**Hope you liked that, it was fun to write. So, Merry Christmas Priest fans, have a good one.**


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